Skip to main content

My precious soul sister, Joy, labors to leave this life. I know she is working hard, just as she has worked so hard her whole life to overcome our human suffering and approach people with ultimate kindness. Since we came together 26 years ago to be lifelong friends, I have witnessed her love so deeply. She has been so incredibly sensitive and generous of spirit. Recently she told me, “I am thinking about death a lot but life is so compelling.” She has been navigating an awful neurological illness and suffering so.

Beth Nielsen Chapman wrote and sings these lyrics:

“Life holds on
Given the slightest chance
For the week and the strong
Life holds on”

Why does life hold on, especially in our final hours? The love of our dear ones? The taste of ice cream? Joy loves ice cream. The moon and stars in a night sky? Witnessing the opening of the first flower in the Springtime? The fear of the unknown?

In the photo Joy and I were doing a trust exercise. Joy is blindfolded and allowing me to lead her. What an extraordinary gift, to share this unconditional trust with another, even if we are afraid. I can only imagine that Joy still has some fear of the unknown “other side” though she cannot directly tell me this. I can say words of faith, or spiritual transcendence aloud to her. But I know these in my head and my heart yet I am also afraid on the mortal body level.

We are all blindfolded in so many ways in this life of ours. Blind to our patterns and habits. Blind to the unknown next part of our hero’s journey. How do we leap with trust and truly believe that everything is unfolding perfectly, in its own time? You taught me to practice this, my beloved Joy, as you taught me so much. We tried to practice this trust and acceptance of ‘not knowing’ together. We still are, as you stand at this threshold between this life and what comes next. I am practicing with you. I pray that on the other side of the blindfolds there is nothing but light and pure love and that it envelops you infinitely.

4 Comments

  • Jean Hollman says:

    this end of life is so important to us living now, those living who share that end with another are lucky, a glow around the dying friend, a chance to help them go to the other side by our words and actions, a practice they give us by their actions, a screaming sadness at the end, some end with great anger at the loss of it all—-

  • Christina Ernst says:

    Dear Ruthie and Joy,
    Thank you so much for sharing this deep beautiful and also very sad thoughts.
    So much is a mystery to us. Your bond and love is very special and will always exist.
    I will breath and move with you.
    Much Love
    Christina

    • admin says:

      Dear Christina,
      I know you speak with empathy and personal wisdom to me. That means alot. And I am finding that relief does come when we move. And then breath comes when we decide to choose Life.
      Only love to you.
      Ruthie

Leave a Reply